A mom goes to a pediatrician
(based on true life events)
Mom: I’m very concerned doctor, my baby is not eating properly. It’s been a week now.
Doctor: Alright tell me what has she eaten from morning till now.
Mom: Well when she got up I was having my breakfast, she had some of it and later had an apple. But as I tried to give her cereal she threw up. It could be a stomach bug.
Doctor: And after that?
Mom: Ok after a bit, she had a pack of crisps with flavoured milk and then in the waiting area shared my croissant.
But, after that, when I offered her mashed potato that I brought for her lunch, she started crying and shaking her head. I think she has trouble swallowing.
Doctor: She seems fine to me. She is refusing food because you just cant stop stuffing her. Read my lips S-H-E I-S N-O-T H-U-N-G-R-Y.
Mom: Can you please check her face. It looks all swelled up don’t you think?
Doctor: Not really. The swelling you see is just fat on her cheeks. She’s perfectly healthy.
Mom: But why does she cry when she wakes up from sleep. Could she be colic. Might have wind in her stomach.
Doctor: NO! STOP!…almost all babies wake up crying because they get scared when they find nobody around.
Mom: I have often noticed her staring at the ceiling. I honestly think we should get an MRI done.
Doctor: (confused) but She isn't old enough to sit on her own.
Mom: Yeah, so?
Doctor: If she can’t sit by herself means she spends most of her time lying on back . Where else would she look at?
Mom: (sheepish) Ok can I ask you something about my elder son?
Doctor (exasperated): Sure.
Mom: We think he has a hearing disability
Doctor: Why would you say that.
Mom: Because he just never listens whatever is he is told to do. We think this is because he is unable to listen properly. Can you recommend a hearing test?
Doctor (now shouting): NO I WILL NOT DO SUCH THING!…NURSE!!
Mom: Just one last question. When do you think is the right time to start teaching him about Theory of Relativity. I mean he just turned 3 yrs
The doctor stomps out of the door.